THANKS A LOT!

by roddy

When Peter was a schoolboy he tried to make it plain
that he was not the sort of child who ought to get the cane.
He always got his spellings right and did his sums with care
he washed his hands each mealtime, and always brushed his hair.
he spoke politely to the staff and did as he was told-
in short, this most obnoxious brat was quite as good as gold!
His classmates could not bear to watch a boy so prim and straight
so plotted to dethrone the child from his angelic state.
One morning, during breakfast, just after grace was said
one boy went up to Peter's dorm and rumpled up his bed!
When Matron did her rounds to see that everything was straight
she was dismayed to see young Peter's bed in such a state
She called young Peter straight upstairs and rounded on the lad
“How can a little boy like you be so extremely bad?
I did not think that you would want to cause me such distress
so please explain -Why did you leave your bed in such a mess?
You ought to know the rule by now, it's time enough been said
that every single morning you must always make your bed!”
“But Matron, I did make my bed” was what he tried to say
but he just stood there tongue-tied, and mumbled in dismay.
“So, you have no excuse, you lazy, spiteful little boy!
Well, what I have to do now, it gives me little joy.”
and saying so she flung the quaking child across her lap
and on his tightened shorts her palm went with a fearful slap.
She gave the lad a few more smacks then set him on his feet
“Now make your bed this instant, and mind you make it neat!”
She marched out from the room and left young Peter to reflect
on what the price for mischief was and what he could expect.
Poor Peter thought that for his good behaviour he'd be thanked
but shame of shames, oh awful day, he'd actually been spanked!
His classmates thought it quite a lark and made the lad relate
a blow by blow account of how he came to meet his fate.
Of course, no self-respecting boy would hold such things in awe
and, truth to tell, the smacks had not left Peter very sore.
What hurt was not the slaps but being treated in that way
unjustly - knowing what his friends were bound to say.
He brooded on these thoughts all day, until the evening came
how he had been unjustly spanked when he was not to blame.
That evening, after, as his classmates went to bed
our Peter went the other way, to Matron's room instead.
He felt he had to tell her, he felt he must explain
exactly why her smacking him had caused him so much pain.

Outside the night was cold and dark, for it was getting late
but Matron's room was cosy, with a bright fire in the grate.
He stood there in his slippers and pyjamas, on the mat
and he stammered and he stuttered and he tried to tell her that
she'd been unjust to him. But he could only blurt
out that the spanking she had given him “hadn't really hurt”
It wasn't what he'd meant to say. He knew he'd said it wrong
but Matron's stern expression had completely tied his tongue
“Well, well, young man, if that's the case I'd think we'd better see
if we can do things better now. Stand over here by me!”
with heart in mouth and quaking knees he did as he was told
but oh, that cosy room had suddenly turned cold.
Matron held her hand out and, with a movement neat
pulled his pyjamas down so they lay crumpled round his feet.
“Now let us see if we can do things better, little chap”
and so saying pulled the hapless child face down across her lap.
“You are a very naughty child and since you do not care
for being smacked upon your shorts then I must smack you bare.”
Upon the next few minutes we do not need to dwell
suffice to say she did her job, and did it very well.
and when, at length, she set young Peter back upon his feet
her efforts showed to good result upon his tender seat.
A much subdued and somewhat tearful little boy went off to bed
to try to tidy up the thoughts that raced around his head
Beneath the blankets Peter's hand reached down to stroke the spot
that , while no longer smarting, was still quite sore and hot.
With hand inside pyjamas he soothes and strokes that place
while up above a secret smile grows slowly on his face
For while he's very sure that this was not quite what was meant
he found to his surprise that he was really quite content.